OVER THE RED LINE ONE: PART 3
I always saw myself as principled a man with high moral standards, but here I was in love with another man’s wife! And it didn’t feel wrong. Rather, this was the best feeling I had ever felt!
We moved to phone calls and spoke for long hours on end as we could not wait to hear each other’s voice, perceive our breath, feel each other’s fears as well as passion. In the euphoric experience that had become our conversations, she sent these words to me:
“Dangerously safe.. intensely mild.. intimately far.. mentally near. a wave of different emotions.. in such a short time… it is refreshingly scary… what we have.”
Swept away by the sweet embrace of her words, my hands reciprocated swiftly with a mind of their own in response:
“Oh, these emotions you referred, spiraling with a force that could penetrate a rock, feelings I am unable to contain, these tears a sign of what I desire but might not have, helplessness a song I have come to know, why should I be scared, why should I deprive myself the privilege of such a beautiful intensity? Is it not when love turns ugly that the heart learns to appreciate the beauty of love? My heart has a mind of its own, it cherishes what we have”.
Then, suddenly! Without warning she blocked me on all her social media platforms and barred all my phone numbers from reaching her. At that moment, I ceased to exist. I felt a million spears go through my heart and my soul stitched a million times to depict the pieces of my broken heart so small it could pass through the eye of a needle. What wrong had I done? Had the intensity of my passion unleashed in words driven her away? This was one of the worst experiences of my life.
As I scrambled for what to do, for without her I felt like a wreck with no salvation, I received a message:
“I love you Uche”
“I thought I could let you go but right now it feels like my heart is literarily breaking into pieces”
“I have unblocked all your numbers”
“I don’t think I can bear not talking with you anymore. We are beyond that, but you need to help me”
She had unblocked and unbarred me, the chemistry at this point was undeniable, our emotions couldn’t be tamed. We got aroused just from listening to each other and expressing our passion without restraint.
Her voice was my tranquilizer and her existence my fix for I was an addict to what she made me feel. This forbidden passion had taken us like a hurricane, and I hoped we weren’t consumed beyond reason.
Our telephone conversations got more intense and addictive. A respected member of her church and an advocate against this kind of unholy desire, a woman that preached integrity and morals, has now found herself exactly in the same situations she always condemned. It was unbelievable! Perhaps, life was testing her? Or teaching her a vital lesson as admonished by the Holy book “Judge not that ye be not judged”.
From all that she felt for Uche, against her own will and right mind, she had come to learn that anyone could be caught in what we call sins of the flesh, all that is needed is the right stage, to unearth the mystery of the heart or unravel the secret of life and the mysterious nature of love.
In all she continued to indulge, danger and passion seduced her to a point of almost no return and at the mercy of her heart’s desires. Now, it’s just a matter of time before the unthinkable happens…
The night is usually my time of frustration, for the presence of her husband comes with a curfew.
On one of such nights, from the depth of my soul and fire freely raging in my heart I sent her a poem as I lay helpless through the night as insomnia had become my unwanted companion:
“The night will tell how much I miss you, for its cuddle help me survive the lonely hands of cold at night, my tears speak the language of my heart and the beauty of what I feel. There is nothing forbidden about something this beautiful or scary about two souls thirsty for each other. If what we feel could be titled, I wonder what it would be…”.
I received a response from my Aphrodite, as she constantly reminded me of the Greek goddess, and she said “I love you” with emojis of kisses.
The fire of my passion, the invisible hands of fate, flood of emotion spiraling out of me at these long-awaited words, if only one could see it, would be in colors of the rainbow. What we have has now escalated to very intimate messages between us, we have lost our senses, dangerously in love and uncaring of the world and all its cultural and moral rules put in place to check such abominable desires shared between the unmarried man and the married woman.
The world calls this “adultery”. The saints deem these desires wrong, but it feels so good and real. For how could something this deep and passionate, so real and beautiful be wrong? We never held back, our desires made me constantly aroused with a strong urge to feel my hands around my goddess, my manhood struggling for the warmth of her caresses but held back by the barriers of professionalism and a little reason, and she, dripping wet each time I fuel her with words that took her to the highest heavens and deeper than the ocean floor. I took her where she had never been and wouldn’t have been able to travel. I made her senses come alive, for fantasies do come true.